The ol' college cry 

If American college students have proven anything, it's that they don't need much prodding to make a party of it. From Cinco de Mayo to Mardi Gras to St. Patrick's Day, they're ready, willing, and able to tap that keg and raise that red Solo cup.

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"Whaddya got? We'll celebrate it!"

On March 18, they stumbled out in green-clad droves to party like drunken leprechauns on so-called St. Fratty's Day.

Some SLOcals saw it coming and weren't having it: "The idea around the event—getting together, getting drunk, overtaking the neighborhood—should not be tolerated," Karen Adler told the SLO City Council on Feb. 21.

Karen, a member of Residents for Quality Neighborhoods, added, "I'm worried because last year, except for 2015, was the worst year we've seen. Our neighborhood was completely taken over by intoxicated young students and it was mayhem. Law enforcement was not in control of the situation, and that's scary."

Do not scare the Karens, kids! For the record, 2015 was the year eight Cal Poly Mensa candidates were injured when the garage roof they were partying on collapsed. College students are dumb. But back to last weekend.

According to the SLO Police Department, it was very productive fines-wise. They issued 21 noise violations, two unruly gathering violation citations, 47 open container citations, 17 public urination citations, eight public intoxication arrests, three minor-in-possession arrests, four DUI arrests, and three providing false name arrests. False names? Really, McLovin?

SLOPD spokesperson Christine Wallace noted, "The crowd was larger than last year; 2022 was estimated at about 2,000. The atmosphere was celebratory."

Aw! Celebratory! Not scary. Cute.

A SLOPD press release pegged the crowd at 4,000 and noted that Hathway Avenue and Bond Street near Cal Poly were closed to traffic on Saturday morning, presumably to let the good times and fines roll. Yet despite these 105 examples of enforcement, to many residents it seemed like the po-po just sat on their hands and let the little college pukes run wild.

One astute observer of the "massive, unruly crowd taking over the neighborhood without being moved" noted a double standard at work: "How is it that the SLOPD and District Attorney Dan Dow can prosecute Tianna Arata and Black Lives Matter for blocking streets and yet the Fratty party did the same with no consequences? All blocking taxpayer-funded public streets and sidewalks and face no arrests for doing so? This is what Arata is charged with doing along with other people of color. Do you not see biased prosecution, favoritism, as the vast majority of the party were white?"

I certainly do.

However, a second year Cal Poly student who spoke anonymously pointed out the futility of the university's neighbors complaining: "You can't cancel the giant mob of students standing on the street. I'm young and naive, so I'm going to have this opinion. It's ridiculous to put yourself in a situation and live about a block away in a college town and complain about kids partying. I want the adult residents to know that you can't cancel it. The police can't even control that. You got to move somewhere else."

Got that, Karen? It's ridiculous. You should have known better than to live near a university. Move.

You know what else is ridiculous? The initiative that could go on the 2024 ballot that aims to throw a big monkey wrench into the gears of government, which will probably be good news to the "make government small enough to drown in a bathtub" crowd.

An organization called California Business Roundtable (CBRT) was able to get the Taxpayer Protection and Government Accountability Act on the ballot, and if passes, it will require two-thirds voter approval for all new special tax increases. Even local tax increases would require a statewide voter majority. Why should a voter in Orange County get a vote on our local school bond or sales tax increase?

The answer is they shouldn't, and judging from the cadre of corporate special interests on the CBRT board, this is a thinly veiled attempt to cut corporate taxes under the guise of protecting the average taxpayer.

"We understand [the CBRT] to be an advocacy group for wealthy real estate groups and corporations," 2nd District SLO County Supervisor Bruce Gibson said. "They're pretty far right and anti-government."

If you want to see government grind to a halt and corporations run roughshod, this is the initiative for you!

Speaking of the SLO County Board of Supervisors, they finally voted 3-2 to join Central Coast Community Energy (3CE), but not before waxing poetic about PG&E, which 3rd District Supervisor Dawn Ortiz-Legg used to work for; she voted yes anyway. First District Supe John Peschong and 5th District Supe Debbie Arnold voted no because some of their constituents work for PG&E.

"These are the guys who drive around in blue trucks," Peschong lamented. "Football dads and football moms. They're community members and they're constituents."

Um, that's nice, but 3CE costs electricity users 39 percent less money than PG&E. I'm not positive, but I'm guessing every single one of Peschong's and Arnold's constituents uses electricity. 3CE is also aiming to supply 100 percent clean energy by 2030, which is 15 years sooner than required by the state. Cheers to the new liberal majority! Δ

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