If you’re talking about voter fraud, you aren’t talking about inflation, gas prices, overly aggressive federal law enforcement, government corruption, or a war in the Middle East that is likely to kick back into gear after you’ve already voted in the midterms.
You also aren’t talking about whatever other batshit crazy bullshit Trumpelthinskin and his mayhem minions have sown in Washington, D.C., and beyond.
Voter fraud is rampant, the administration keeps saying over and over again.
So, does what the Department of Justice has done recently make it true? It sued the state of California to hand over confidential voter information. It alleged the existence of thousands of “likely alien voters” across the state, and it’s even charged some folks with voter fraud for registering to vote and/or actually voting in elections.
California is not unique in being targeted. The DOJ has done the same in at least 20 states across the country, including ultra-red Florida and purplish Nevada.
In Nevada, the DOJ alleged that 16,000 of the state’s more than 2 million registered voters were “likely alien voters.” Likely is an interesting turn of phrase, amirite? Nevada’s secretary of state pushed back, demanding the proof that was found before handing over confidential voter records.
The DOJ came back with a list of fewer than 200 that the secretary of state then found were actually not voting illegally. On Oct. 28, the DOJ filed voter fraud cases against two non-citizens in Nevada, alleging that they voted illegally.
“As these cases show, the public and political narrative that Nevada’s elections are not fraught with fraud is categorically false,” Sigal Chattah from the Nevada U.S. Attorney’s Office declared.
The allegations? These two noncitizens voted in the 2024 election.
Fraught is a strong word for two out of 2.06 million voters. Also, DOJ charges don’t equal truth, as we all know from the past two years of throwing shit at the wall against Trump’s political “enemies” and hoping it sticks.
So, what does this have to do with San Luis Obispo County?
I’m so glad you asked. The SLO County Clerk-Recorder’s Office, similar to most of California’s other counties, recently received a demand letter from the DOJ alleging that 63 “likely alien voters” were illegally registered to vote in the upcoming election. And could Clerk-Recorder Elaina Cano simply pull those ballots aside if they’re cast, segregating them from the rest of the pack?
Well. That’s quite an ask from an agency with a track record of alleging that fully fledged, legal American citizens weren’t citizens when they voted. It reeks of desperation and last-minute grandstanding as we head into an election that could change the trajectory of Dicktator Trump’s presidential legacy.
What’s Cano going to do about it? Request denied!
So, about the same as many of the county clerk-recorder types across the state.
“We take allegations of improper voter registration seriously and will always cooperate with lawful investigations conducted through appropriate channels,” Cano said. “But cooperation does not mean setting aside the laws we are sworn to uphold.”
I mean, just look at her track record. This county has filed at least two voter fraud cases against people who have run for office in the last two election cycles.
Orange County prosecuted a woman for voter fraud because she registered her dog to vote! The dog voted in the 2021 recall election against Gov. Gavin Newsom. Wild. The woman’s punishment was to pay for billboards against voter fraud along two freeways.
“Don’t be a dog. Voter fraud is a crime,” they read.
We take a bite out of crime here in California. We are ruff on fraudulent voting!
But seriously. Is it surprising that out of the millions of people across the United States of America who vote in every election cycle, the DOJ has found about 180 people to file voter fraud cases against after dedicating hundreds of hours of personnel time and how many millions of dollars to “Operation Protect the Vote”?
More than 150 million people voted in the 2024 presidential election.
It would have been shocking if the DOJ hadn’t found a single soul to file voter fraud charges against.
Not all of the noncitizens even knew they were registered to vote, and many haven’t voted in a single election. Some even registered as Republicans and voted for Trump in 2024. Shocker!
It’s not a vast conspiracy or proof of rampant voter fraud.
Meanwhile, a Brazilian presidential candidate who is under investigation for fraudulent fundraising activities, taking money from foreign entities (connected to our very own Vice President JD Vance), and potential corruption charges fled to the U.S. after losing the election in Brazil. I guess the Trump administration is OK with some alleged illegal activities from “likely aliens” and not others.
Speaking of votes, you should vote if you haven’t. There’s still time before Nov. 3 to get that ballot in. I know that it’s two full pages of propositions and candidates to work through, but it’s important.
Your choices now dictate more than what happens to the oldest man to ever run the country. They matter to the students in your neighborhood, the residents in your community, the people who call California home, and all the citizens and noncitizens who live in these United States. ∆
The Shredder can’t register to vote. Send your advice to shredder@newtimesslo.com.
This article appears in Oct 29 – Nov 5, 2026.
